Time for Twilight to fade into Darkness

I have read the Twilight series, watched both installments of the movie franchise, and have listened to every obsessed fan chant about how they dream of falling into a whirlwind romance with either a vampire or werewolf.

Having said that, I can subjectively and objectively state that the Twilight books and movies bite...vampire pun intended.

For all you Twihard fans out there who are getting ready to hunt me down like werewolves hunt vampires, or like the Volturi search for the Cullens, give me a chance to explain my reasoning, just like I gave the Twilight franchise a chance.

Let us start with the books, shall we? I have no authority or credibility to dishonor someone's writing, as getting one's work published is an accomplishment in and of itself. However, Stephanie Meyer's books are filled with juvenile writing, unsophisticated language and undeveloped ideas. Yet, she writes the series this way for a reason----TWILIGHT IS MADE FOR ADOLESCENTS!

Sorry to all you 40-year old women out there wearing "Team Edward" shirts, but the books are made for 13-year old screaming girls who are falling in love with the idea of falling in love, but have yet to experience it. If you are over the age of 15 and are in love with the series, I seriously question your choice of reading and comprehension abilities. What ever happened to the classics?...to beautiful literature?...to the days of William Shakespeare and Jane Austen?...to the literature that brought forth new thinking and changed the world?...to prose so sweet, so pure, that the Holy Spirit must have overcame the author's pen to write such heavenly words fit for angels? Twilight CAN NOT and WILL NEVER be considered pure literature.

Now, on to the movies. I'm not really sure what everyone else saw in the theatres when they said "New Moon WAS ONE OF THE BEST MOVIES I'VE SEEN!", but all I saw was a cheesy film with bad acting and even worse cinematography. New Moon seemed to drag on forever, and missed the element of a good movie--something called a plot. If any of you Twihards out there even noticed, there is NO PLOT FOR NEW MOON! Even if you scramble together a poorly developed plot, it will only be a pathetic excuse for a waste of 2 hours worth of film.

And I'm sorry, but Kristin Stewart and Rob Pattinson had absolutely NO chemistry onscreen. Argue whichever way you want, but this is a fact not an opinion. Every scene with them together was awkward and unappealing, and if you try to argue against this by saying, "You dummy, you don't know what you're talking about! It's SUPPOSED to be that way because of the book!" HAA! No you adolescent pathetic immature imbecile, they're just both really bad actors.

I can go on and on with this forever, but regardless, you Twihard fans won't win. I'm sorry for being so harsh, but I'm getting pretty fed up with this New Moon/Twilight craziness. There are more important things in life, REAL things in life to mind yourself with rather than fantasize about werewolves and vampires.


Really people, grow up and pick up a REAL book.